


Trick or Treat (The Punishment Due)

by Noir_Dix



Series: à la carte [4]
Category: Ghost (Sweden Band)
Genre: Bats! (whoa-ooh-whoa-ohh), F/M, Fuzzy socks, Gen, Jealousy, Mary Mary quite contrary, Mary., Other, Reckless Endangerment, Shapeshifting, Threats, antique riding crop, beware of cute, blanket toga, corn maze, fucking on the phone, halloween decor, minor vamp action, strange relationship roles
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-10-22
Updated: 2019-10-31
Packaged: 2020-12-24 04:08:07
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 3,785
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21093134
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Noir_Dix/pseuds/Noir_Dix
Summary: Absurdity:Halloween edition.





	1. Chapter 1

Mary was driving _well_ over the posted speed limit. He was also on his fourth Pall Mall cigarette.

"Trying to smoke the whole pack?"

He glanced at his unwanted passenger; wearing that ridiculous white suit after Labor Day.

"Fuck off. I got a carton." he somehow managed to snarl.

"Hm." the Cardinal had been a study in silence... floppy black hat pulled down, arms folded.

He now searched for his antique cigarette case, with his little hand-rolled cigars.

The thing was elaborately engraved, as was the old fart's pocket watch... Dripping disgusting sentiment from Dix, from over a hundred years ago.

Either item tended to make Mary want to gag.

He'd caught her, making a late call, the night before. He'd turned up, just after dusk, & insisted that he accompany Mary in whatever it was she'd asked him to do.

There'd been a minor kerfuffle, & he'd finally suggested that they "borrow" his bitch mother's beloved hooptie. Mary had finally agreed, under protest.

She was going to have a fit... especially if he fired up a doobie, before all was said & done.

Then, they'd very nearly killed each other, over what CD to listen to.

He quietly sang along to "House of the Rising Sun", as interpreted by Dolly Parton. He lit his cigar, & Mary noticed he had Dix's knock-off Zippo. He blew a smoke ring, happily.

"Such a beautiful woman. Such talent."

Mary waited.

"Such magnificent tits."

He snorted.

"I thought you were an ass man."

"I can be any thing, at any time."

Mary shook his head.

"You're a selfish old bastard."

"Hm." was Basil's response.

Again.

He was beyond irritated. Dix had asked him to pick up a few items for her. Unfortunately, the items were at the mall.

Basil had gotten some of the dumbest shit he'd ever seen. He'd finally given up, with the outlandish men's underwear featuring a rooster for the crotch.

(It was all diversion. For the few silly things, there were several very, very _nice_ things. Mary was so appalled, that he missed them.)

They began to see the first of the signs.

"Come get lost in our corn maze..." Basil squinted. "Why?"

"Really?" Mary asked. "You're as old as fucking sin, & you don't know about corn mazes?"

He thought.

"Maybe."

"Oh, for fuck's sake." he slowed down, only just slightly. "Let's see how the rat man does in the maze."

"No, we really should be getting back-"

"What? Are you chicken? You _did_ just buy the underwear."

"There's an inside joke, there." Basil muttered.

"Naturally." Mary held up a hand, forestalling him. "I don't want to hear about it."

***

Dix wandered the halls of the church, marvelling at the absolute chaos.

She'd risen, just past dusk, to find herself alone. The bed was still warm-ish. She almost missed the little scrap of paper, again.

_Had to go do a thing~_  
_Love always,_  
_Your Basil._  
_XOXO_

Whatever _that_ meant. She'd thrown on some sweats, & a Halloween t-shirt that read: Witch parking only, all others will be toad.

The unholy sisterhood was out in force, starting to decorate for the holiday...

Because, Halloween was a _big fucking deal_ this year, apparently.

"Dix!" Keebie waved. "Tell me what you think-"

Dix stared.

It was Terzo's mannequin. In a trenchcoat. Rigged to flash, with the biggest dildo she could recall seeing.

Right off hand.

"Umm-"

"Isn't he _great_?" Keebie kissed the thing's cheek.

Dix had always wondered how they put the head back on. Basil still claimed he had no idea.

The dildo looked familiar.

"Is that the dildo Omega was waving around in those pictures, a while back?"

Keebie grinned, fiendish.

"Mayyybe."

Terzo would love it. He'd have to sneak back in to see...

Sister Lyn lurked at the edges. Dix noticed she had a small flask.

Katy walked by, with a fantastic cinnamon broom. The smell was almost overwhelming.

"These ghouls, honestly."

"Are they misbehaving?" Dix asked.

Katy blinked.

"Yes. Swiss _most_ especially."

Dix chuckled, as she headed over to playfully swat the tall, sexy ghoul.

Sister Lisa was draping crepe paper on the gargoyles & any leftover statuary.

"Dix!" Dawna called from one of the open offices. "I've found _so_ many things online- Naughty, naughty tapestries... Naughty, naughty statues. That's not even getting into the _major_ remodeling."

She smiled. The clergy had only recently taken this particular church. Even though there was much to be done, it didn't have the taint of the poisoning, & the bloodline "murders".

Sister Rain was having visions of Hogwarts, & Dawna was momentarily distracted.

Mary crept up behind her, & hugged her around the waist.

"Hey, mama." he breathed, kissing his favorite spot behind her ear.

Her skin crawled.

Not in a bad way.

"Hey, trouble." feeling indulgent, she reached to ruffle his raven hair.

"Mmm..." he very nearly purred. "Heliga skit. How'd Per get up _there_?"

Dew was up on the chandelier.

Apparently, by magic.

She could see his grayish-green eyes, blinking behind his mask.

"Dix?" she somehow heard him. "Give me a minute-"

"You still haven't told me _that_ story." Mary murmured. She felt his lips, at the edge of her ear.

"No more story to tell." she turned to face him. "Ugh, Mary... Corpse paint? Really?"

He grinned.

"Trick or Treat, baby. Would you rather give me some skull-paint?"

"You know I only do that for Basil."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I asked for input.  
The seesters' bits are highlights.
> 
> (Y'all will be back, briefly.)


	2. Chapter 2

Her phone rang, & she jumped out of her skin.

"God damn, Papa! This ringtone's as bad as _Faith_..."

"-around the magic that is black-" Mary sang along, under his breath. "That was a good song."

He also wiggled a bit, which was downright unsettling.

"Dix-eee?"

_Never a good sign._

"Basil? What-?"

"Ah, skit." Mary tried unsuccessfully to sort of... drift away.

"Help."

"Help? What?" she grabbed a thin white arm. "Mary Jane Goore, stay your translucent ass right where it is."

"I'm lost."

"You're lost."

"I seem to be lost."

"Basil, where are you?"

"I see..."

She waited.

And, waited.

"...corn."

"Corn?"

Mary was grinning like a fool.

"A rat lost in a maze! _Fuck._ No, wait... a corn-u-Copia! Sometimes, I amaze myself."

"You insufferable little bastard, _what have you done_?"

"Uh, Dix?"

She pinched the bridge of her nose.

"Yes, dear?"

"Help?"

She had a thought.

"Did you download that app? To find your phone?"

"Do what, now?"

She sighed. She couldn't talk... she didn't have it, either.

"Mary, where did you leave him?"

"Cornfield."

She punched a bony shoulder.

"Ow! Somewhere, out off the interstate-" he gestured vaguely.

"A ways away?"

"Oh-ho, _yeah_." he laughed. "A ways away? Who even talks like that?"

"_I do._" she hissed. "You are such a little shit."

Dew had somehow materialized in their midst.

"Basil-" she covered her mouth, "Baby, you know I can't fly, & you're too far away."

Now, he sighed.

"I was afraid of that."

"Just- leave your clothes somewhere, that we can go back & find them."

"This was a very expensive suit-"

"Which one?"

"The white. Ah, well..."

"Why do you keep letting him _do_ these things?"

"Oh, you know-"

"I called him chicken." he snickered.

She glared. It was probably a combination of things.

"I'll wait outside for you."

"You don't have to do that, il mio amore. It's awfully chilly out."

"Yes, I do."

"I'll be there, soon. Ti amo. _I need to do unspeakable things to you._"

He growled the last.

"I love you too, baby." she smiled, which earned her a disgusted look from Mary.

She gave him a look in return that should have roasted his balls.

Dew cleared his throat, awkwardly.

"Dix?"

"Per." she used his name.

He blinked at her some more.

"Are you, umm-" he thought, "hungry? Thirsty?"

He wasn't sure of the terminology. She thought it was rather cute.

"Dix?" Mary was jealous.

"I just so happen to be both, my dear ghoul." she took his arm. "If we're going to keep meeting like this, Per, you'll have to lose the mask."

"Oh. Okay."

He was so soft-spoken. It blew her mind.

Mary gave it a good few minutes, before stalking out to find her. He just couldn't stand it, anymore.

The moon wasn't quite full, but, still shone brightly.

He passed Dew, coming back in. He was weaving a bit, with a silly grin. He didn't even bother to acknowledge him.

"What was _that_?" he seethed. "Since when do you _suck_ ghouls?"

He made it sound filthy.

Her jaw set. She was beyond mad.

"_You know_, since when."

"He fancies you."

She shrugged.

"Whatever. I just needed a little pick-me-up, to deal with your shenanigans."

_My_ shenanigans? The raggedy old bastard inflicted himself on me, earlier."

"Were you going to leave him stranded, Mary? There could have been Jiffy-Pop, at sunrise."

"_And_?" he again tried to embrace her.

She elbowed him. Hard.

"Come to the cottage. I'm still working on it, but, I _need_ you... I'll take anything you give me."

"Mary, I am _this_ close-" she gestured, "To doing you some serious harm. Please, back THE FUCK off."

He did, surprised at her venom.

"Look, there he is." she looked up at the moon.

"Oh, for fuck's sake."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (Somebody got a middle name...)  
(Elf approved.)
> 
> I over-thought it for a couple of days.  
Then, *ding*.
> 
> Mary on a...  
& my all time favorite Megadeth tune.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This one's my favorite.  
🦇🖤

It looked like an upside-down moustache. As she watched, his wing tilted, & he began a series of long, loopy downward spirals.

_Bat_. She really loved him as a bat. He looked to be dark brown, & using the guise of a fruit bat.

She'd bet his fur was shot through with gray, upon closer inspection.

He was headed straight for Mary's, well... head.

She tried not to laugh, but, it was impossible.

He bopped him good.

"You son of a bitch!" Mary shouted, blood coursing from his temple. "_He did that on purpose._"

Well, _duh_.

She grabbed for him, before Mary could try something.

In what had to be one of their weirdest tableaus, she stood, holding a good-sized bat to her chest. He'd stretched his soft, leathery wings to span her shoulders. He stared over his shoulder at Mary, balefully.

Then, he started the squawking. Once he started, it was nonstop.

Mary raised a hand.

"Mary." she warned.

He spun & stalked off.

_Cottage_. It was a damn shed.

She sighed, relieved.

"Okay, let's-" she frowned, trying to untangle him. He trembled terribly, & looked at her with sad little mismatched bat eyes. "I'm going to tilt you on your back a bit... Now, fold your wings in."

She held him like a swaddled bat-baby.

"This should be fun." she groused. "We've got a gauntlet of festive sisters to make it through."

He somehow managed to reach up & start licking her neck.

"That tickles." she giggled.

Once inside, she confirmed that he _was_ rather gray. His little ears were twitching every which way.

"Dix?" it was Keebie, her elf-friend.

If she had a dollar bill, for all the times she'd heard-

She'd have a few dollars.

"Keebie."

"_What_ is-"

"It's a long story. The story of a sad, cold little bat... that some bratty asshole left in a _fucking corn maze_."

Her voice went progressively higher. Her ears turned a stark, bloody red, & her neck, an alarming mottled pink.

"Oh, my." she peered at the mismatched bat eyes. "Is that-?"

She took several deep breaths.

She could _kill_ Mary.

The other sisters were gathering 'round. He tried closing his pale eye...

Because, green-eyed bats were a dime-a-dozen, apparently.

"Why, that looks like a fruit bat." Dawna frowned, "Fruit bats aren't domestic..."

"He's kind of a pet."

Could a bat look any _less_ amused?

"He's adorable." Keebie pronounced.

_ Yes. Yes, he was. _

And, if he puffed up any more, he might just explode.

"Girls, I love you all. Keep on doing what you're doing."

"You got it." Katy made a bee-line for Rain... Or, perhaps it was the small ghoulette.

Maybe both.

A pale wraith lingered in the doorway.

"I bet you that fucker's got rabies."

It called.

It took her last shred of self-control, to ignore him.

She started to hum randomly, & her bat baby chittered here & there.

_Did_ bats chitter? She didn't know. This one was.

"Ah, suite sweet suite." she said, retrieving her key. "See what I did there?"

He wasn't impressed.

"Hey, it's been a long night."

She went to set him on the bed, & he scrambled to cling to her, licking her neck again.

"Aww- did you like me toting you around?"

He chattered some more, & she gently squeezed him, before he let her put him down on the mattress.

Bat cuddles. Something new every day.

She headed for the fireplace.

"_Pet_-" he coughed. "Let me do it."

She caught that.

She paused, & then he was behind her, skin like cold marble. He hugged her tightly around the waist, & kissed the curve of her neck.

"Go find us the bourbon."

He got the fire turned on. She got the liquor, & also fetched a super plush, very _red_ blanket...

With enormous balls for trim.

"Very nice." he approved, scooting back against the headboard. "I noticed that _you're_ rather warm."

She draped the blanket over his shoulders.

He kissed her, & melted half of her bones.

"Per was floating around."

"On a first name basis, with the gremlin?"

"You're so cold." she was upset.

She was also very obviously trying to change the subject.

He let her.

"Not only that. I just flew in... & boy, are my arms tired."


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> And then, it all went wrong...
> 
> (This is where "The Punishment Due" comes in.)
> 
> (There *are* methods to my madness.)

He grinned.

Which, as always, looked very _wrong_. 

She got up to raid one of their drawers, producing a pair of fuzzy socks. She sat back down, & began to rub his feet.

"There's nothing wrong with- ooh."

She kissed his arch. His feet still smelled like his ivory leather shoes.

She kissed an ankle, & unballed the socks.

"My word... Only you could make putting socks on, sexy."

She smiled, pressing a kiss inside a leg.

"I like your current rate of progression."

She looked back, watching him wiggle his toes in the socks.

"I'm _so_ mad at Mary."

"Mad, or disappointed?"

"Fucking angry. Irate."

"Do tell."

"I'd like to tearhis ass up, with your old riding crop."

He blinked.

"I'd like to watch."

"Naughty."

"You were _that_ worried, over your papa?"

She bit her lip.

"Mmm-hmm."

"It's up to you." he said. "All I had planned was a boiling hot bath, & maybe fucking two or three times."

"Two or three times?" she grinned.

"I _am_ awfully tired." he lamented.

"Hm." she stood, "In the mood for a little strip-tease?"

"Strip, yes. You don't have to tease."

She shed her clothes, easily.

"Ooh, chilly." she shivered.

He held the blanket open, like a cape.

"Come, have a seat." he waggled his eyebrows.

She kissed him, as he poked around.

"I ought to make that call."

"Summon him. I _dare_ you."

She grabbed her phone from the nightstand.

"You _really_ shouldn't encourage me."

"I'm curious to see how far you'll take it."

She punched in the number. It rang three times.

"Dix. What." he answered.

_Peevish._

"Oh, _Mary_-" she purposely made her voice tremble, "I need- I need to talk to you."

Basil watched this exchange, with eyebrows raised.

"I'm sorry." he actually apologized, hastily. "Where are you? Back in the suite?"

"Yes." she sniffled.

Basil grabbed behind her knees, & tilted her backward.

"Shameful." he breathed.

"It'll take me a bit, I just got back across the grounds-"

"That's all right." she made her voice break.

"Jesus, I'm _so_ hard-"

She hung up.

"Put my phone back, please."

As he did, the blanket slipped. He _was_ alarmingly erect.

She spread her legs a bit more.

"Take me."

"Your wish is my command."

He crawled back over her.

"Pin my wrists down."

"What's gotten into you?"

"About six inches of Satanic panic?" she giggled.

"You think you're funny- Ohh, Dio. Ti senti sempre così bene..."

"Mmm..." she wiggled under his grip. "You _really_ want me to flog your minion?"

"Sììì- I want you to make him bleed."

"You're sick."

"And, besides- he's _your_ boy, now."

"Thanks a lot."

Soon enough, there was a fierce pounding on the door.

"Oh, FUCK. Trigger."

She laughed breathlessly.

"Two more times."

"It's nice to be wanted." he panted, clinging to her. "ALL RIGHT. We _hear_ you."

He rose, & arranged the blanket into a sloppy toga. She retrieved her t-shirt from earlier, & pulled her legs up.

"That is a rather _short_ shirt." he stared.

"So?"

"I can see your pink bits."

"Oh, you can not." she rolled her eyes. "Besides, you were just there."

"And, I'll be back." he muttered, going to the doors.

Mary stood, defiant.

"Well. Aren't you cute? Go away. We just ran out of Snickers bars."

"I got a call."

"I am aware. I was in a tight spot, for that call."

Mary blinked.

"That's not what that- Eww."

"You were deceived, witch-boy... by one _far_ superior."

"What's with _this_ silly get-up?" he gestured to the blanket toga.

He posed, dramatically.

"Friends, Romans, countrymen... Lend me your ears."

"What's in the sack, Mac?" Dix quipped.

"_Ears_."

And, they laughed.

"Find me the thing, baby."

He tutted.

"Pour me a drink, woman... & mind your pink bits." he looked at Mary; the two men stood eye to eye. "Talk to your mother."

"Basil-"


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This did not turn out *at all* like expected.

"What is this? I thought you _needed_ me."

"Mary-" she cleared her throat. She poured the bourbon in one of the glasses she'd gotten, earlier. "I hope it'sokay_, _neat."

"But of course."

Mary was staring... Right between her legs.

Okay. So maybe it _was_ a short shirt.

"Told you so."

"Mary-" she started again, "You made me rather _mad_, with this stunt."

He smirked.

"Mad, or disappointed?"

"Mad. God damn it." she snapped, handing Basil his glass. "What is it, with you two? Mad. _Angry_."

"Ooh..." Mary mocked her. "I'm so scared."

_Oh, shit._

Basil had found the crop. He handed it to her, with a little flourish & bow, eyes wide.

"Make me proud."

"Take off your boots."

"_Make_ me." he sneered.

Basil clung to one of the bedposts, _far_ too entertained.

"Damn you, Mary Jane. Do as you're told."

"No."

"_Enough_." Basil snarled, shoving him back, & yanking the boots off.

"Thanks, _Daddy_." she batted her eyes at him.

His own eyes fluttered. There was a highly suspicious bump in his toga.

"Evil, evil, EVIL woman."

"End of the bed. Face the foot. Hands & knees."

"Just what in the hell are you trying to prove?" he _still_ wouldn't do as she said.

Basil sighed, in the process of removing his blanket, (& leaving the socks in place).

"Let her punish you."

"Punish _me_? I don't fucking think so."

She pulled at his ridiculous studded belt. The thing looked like vintage Mötley Crüe.

"We can do this the easy way, or the hard way."

Basil steered him somewhat in the direction she wanted. She yanked at his gray skinny jeans. They always sat on his hips, anyway.

Then, it was the boxer-briefs.

She chuckled.

"Total death metal boxer-briefs. Mary, I can't even take you seriously."

She had gotten on her knees, behind him. Basil was on his knees, behind her.

"Does he have a safe word?" he asked softly, nipping her earlobe, hands creeping under her shirt.

"Safe word?" Mary snorted. "Safe words are for pussies."

"Oh, Basil-" she moaned, "Preparing for the second coming?"

"I can't help it, _mama_." he was up her ass, again. Not inserted, but, making his presence known. "This is turning into a rather titillating encounter."

He pressed her flush against Mary's backside, as she began peeling down his underwear.

"Should I get the box?"

"Oh, Basil... No. Not the box."

He was sliding up & down. She felt him squirt a bit, right at the top of her crack.

She whimpered. He knew all the very worst things, (that she liked best).

"I think you should peg his pretty ass." he squeezed her hips. "Make him think of a safe word, real quick.

"Basil, I'm about to combust."

"Mmm-" he bit the curve of her neck. He slid a long middle finger between her slick folds, before finding her core.

She gasped, as he bent it, then wiggled to take more.

"My darling, you're on _fire_." Two fingers, tickling her internally. "At least let me get some handcuffs, so he won't jerk himself off on our nice linens."

He was being contrary enough to do it, too.

Basil removed his fingers, taking a moment to lick them, before going back to pet her pubic mound.

"Basil?"

"Yes, dear?" he stood, & she missed his cock up her ass.

"The red crucifix."

"Ohh-" he twitched, noticeably. He started, just covering himself with a hand... then, his fingers closed around-

"Basil."

He blinked, eyes wild.

"Bloody Mary on a cross... Sì. Bene, bene."

She really didn't know about going _that_ far, but, Basil had made it impossible to cane him.

She wanted his lovely ass in ribbons, & then, a nice bath with her bat-daddy.

"You're a twisted little _bitch_." Mary snarled.

Okay. So, maybe he _should_ have his ass reamed.

"Call me that again, & it will be the last thing you ever get to say."

"Indeed." Basil had a chest under his arm. It was disturbingly similar to the one that had held Terzo's prop head.

She'd never noticed.

"They were on sale." he shrugged. "But, honor thy father & thy mother, you miserable little shit. Call her that again, & it will be the last thing you get to do, period."

She fiddled with the old bamboo.

"Not feeling it, pet?"

She didn't answer.

"Want me to do it?"

She smiled a little.

"No."

"He ruined it."

She had no idea how... but, Basil managed to pull Mary off of the bed by the back of his neck, & physically thrust him from the room, tossing his boots into the hall after him.

He came back to sit on the side of the bed.

"Hurt your feelings?" he took her hand, & started kissing each & every knuckle.

She felt silly.

"It was uncalled for." he looked about the room. "The little shit didn't even bring the stuff in from the car."

"Oh? My few items? Supposedly, your tagging along is what set him off."

"Those things, & a few more." he winked. "They must still be in mother's car, though."

"Sweet, fancy Lucifer... Unless, he threw everything out on the side of the highway-"

"Don't even say such things. I wouldn't put it past him, right now."

She sighed, & he scooted back, pulling off her shirt, before wrapping his arms around her.

He looked down, caressing a breast, apparently unable to help himself.

"I _like_ bat-daddy."

She almost didn't hear him.

He kissed her.

"Want to go take that bath? Try to warm up my old bones a little more?"

She nodded. 

_Double, double toil and trouble;_  
_ Fire burn and caldron bubble._

FIN(?)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Halloween. 🎃
> 
> Tell me what y'all think.


End file.
